Friday, June 26, 2015

The Potter's Lamb: It's Been A Year

The Potter's Lamb: It's Been A Year: Well, in all actually it has been more than a year but close enough. I am pretty fuzzy headed today, it has been a long week and now my swee...

It's Been A Year

Well, in all actually it has been more than a year but close enough. I am pretty fuzzy headed today, it has been a long week and now my sweet boy is sick but this has been on my heart for a while now. Our life has gone though a lot of changes in a year.  The spiritual changes have been more than I can count. Even though it has been ten years some people still see the old Brittany. The one who lived in sin, who made many bad choices and chose to have an affair, get pregnant and divorced. They don't see how Christ has changed me, humbled me. None of my own accord but from prayer and the Word of God. It makes me so sad when I see them out. They notice me and look away; I try not to let it hurt when I speak and they look past me and walk away. But I won't lie, sometimes it feels like a burn that you try and ignore and then the fire bites so bad you can only cry out. Thankfully we can cry out to the ultimate Comforter.  I hurt that they are missing out on forgiveness that has so freely been given to them. They are missing the peace that forgiveness brings and more than that they saying they they don't think Christ death and Resurrection was good enough for my sin. I always remind my sweet children one of my favorite quotes: Some people are so poor all they have is money. I think it could also be said that some people are so hurt all they have is hate. We cannot let our hate consume us or we are denying others the forgiveness we so desperately need.

Ephesians 1:7 In Him we have redemption through His blood, the forgiveness of sins, in accordance with the riches of God's grace.

Sunday, May 11, 2014

Happy Mothers Day to Future Moms!

I can't promise you anything. I can't promise you children screaming your name. I can't promise you  sleepless nights from an infant who only wants his mommy. I can't promise you little league pictures, last days of school or mother of the bride dresses. I can only offer word of hope and peace. Comfort when the Word of the Lord is the only place to find comfort. 1 Peter 1:3-5 says, "What a God we have! And how fortunate we are to have him, this Father of our Master Jesus! Because Jesus was raised from the dead, we’ve been given a brand-new life and have everything to live for, including a future in heaven—and the future starts now! God is keeping careful watch over us and the future. The Day is coming when you’ll have it all—life healed and whole" Take that promise that God is watching over you. He hears every heartache and sees every tear that falls. God's blessing makes life rich; nothing we do can improve on God. (Proverbs 10:22)
May next year you be woken up to shrill crying and if in twenty years the blessing of children never come, take heart in the one who has overcome the word. 

Thursday, April 24, 2014

Reconciled to Christ

The past few weeks I have been convicted. The Holy Spirit just has overwhelmed me about who I am. I am no longer the person I was eight years ago. How lost I was! I didn't even know it. I hated myself and took it out on everyone, the people who loved me the most and I closed myself off from the Holy Spirit. What a lonely place to only have your heart to be your guide.
I have since been reconciled to Redeemer. He wooed me, patiently when I deserved to be cast off as the adulterer I was. Sexual sins are no worse on the sin scale but they tear your heart up more than most any sins since they usually leave other peoples hearts raw, broken.
I is a word I use too much. My journey is nothing with out Christ. He is the One who pulled me out of the darkest pit of my life. I learned so much and gained the most wonderful children from the time I was lost. There is no flow to the post just an outpouring of my heart to tell you that the Light of the world will end the darkest, deepest ocean floor of pain with just a repented heart willing to reconcile to Him.

Wednesday, August 21, 2013

Time for a Job Change

I am sitting at the computer again trying to think up ways to make extra money. I have had lots of ideas, some that are even pretty good, others that I may still try out. However, I realized that maybe the reason I am not making any money is because that is not what God has called me to do. Maybe he really did call me all the years ago when I dedicated my life to missions to serve on the missions field. So here I am 30, and deciding it's to finally listen and pull a Jonah! 

I am not exactly sure what I'll be doing and how much right away but I know I am called to serve and NOW is the time to start. I forgot to say where, did I? I know that is always important to find out where someone is! Joplin is where I'll be answering the call. The lost are here in this city and they are my neighbors. I was created to tell other people about Christ and His love and I can only do that by loving and befriending the people I see everyday. 

I'm kinda scared. I know who I'll seek out first. His family is the reason I was able to be drawn to Christ in the first place. Jay and Julie St. Clair are home to me. I know with their and my families support I know I will be able to serve Christ and fulfill my calling in life.

Thursday, July 25, 2013

It's About That Time of Year!


If you are thinking back to school, then you are kinda right but that is not what I am talking about. I am talking about my birthday! (Imagine me saying like Rapunzel in Tangled) It is a little over a month away and here lately I have really been struggling internally about birthday parties. I have no problem when people throw family birthday parties for their kids or when they scheme elaborate surprise parties that cost hundreds of dollar. Whatever works for your family is best for you.
 This year I'd like to invite everyone to celebrate my birthday! Wait, what? You live across the big ocean? We went to high school together and you always thought I was judge-y and weird? Yeah, that was true. But I want us to celebrate because I'm turning 30! We may have cake and I'll go out to eat with my family but I am thinking present right now! Guess what? I already know what I want! You are in luck because I am going to tell you.... Right now! I have two ideas for you. I'd like you to get some groceries and head to Watered Garden Rescue Mission and drop them off. They need everything right now. Don't worry about waiting for my birthday if you get paid tomorrow and it works better for you. You can also help by texting "Irescue1" to 501501 and make your $5 donation today. How easy did I make my birthday gift? 
Now for my friends who live further than a gas tank away from Joplin, MO, please help out your local mission. Here is a helpful link that you can just click on and it will help you locate the food pantries near you! 
So now that you know, let's make a difference! These are children, men and women in our home towns that are going to bed hungry and we can help!

Please if you decide to celebrate with me this year, I'd love to get pictures of your family dropping off food or supplies or even gift cards. Thanks so much for thinking outside the box this year!




Tuesday, June 25, 2013

Insecure


Have you been there? So insecure that you wonder if you'll ever have true friends or the people you think are your friends really like you. Where I am now, is where I am praying you will never be. Trying to be perfect is impossible but sometimes your heart just refuses to listen to logic. I even know why I have been trying to be perfect. I am trying to make up for my past. You know that past that is gone, that Jesus completely wiped cleaned, yeah that one. I am so insecure about it. I feel like people still see me as that girl who had an affair.

Why can I not forgive myself when I know others have? I know the shackle of this sin is open but I just haven't been able to remove it. I wake up ever day and try and figure out how I can atone for my past. Who can I help, what can I clean, what can I give up to somehow cover up every wrong doing that has been shared by the gossip of many.

So why am I blogging this, you may ask? Well the reason is two fold. One, I am working on handing this baggage over to The Lord. I have been searching His word and studying as I seek to turn this over to Him. This is way more difficult than I ever imaged it would be. Not because He isn't willing, but because every day I am having to give it back over and over again because my insecurities get the best of me. Second, I want others to know that people who may seem to have it all together struggle with a sin such as pride and forgiveness. My youth minister, my senior year of high school, said something to me that I'll never forget. I'll leave you with it: "What makes your sin so great that Jesus can't forgive you?"