Saturday, February 25, 2012
I guess it is more of an it. Your past will find you. No matter if you run and hide, move across the country or just like me, the next state over. I made monumental mistakes while I lived my life in Joplin so after 25 years, lots of broke hearts and hoping for a fresh start on life I moved to Oklahoma. Well, within the first few months I ran into my past. People who I had hurt were still popping in my life. Believe it or not, we moved again and after telling the Lord, "No! I didn't want to go to the Christian church in town!" We decided to go. Sure enough, I ran into three people from college and my ex-husband's family. I think as I sat down I started to cry and laugh to myself. Shocked is an understatement of my feelings at the exact moment in my life. All I had wanted to move on and act as if my old life and the people who's hearts I crushed didn't exist anymore. God always has another plan for us when we run. I'm sure if you have heard of Jonah you know what I am talking. I don't think God really minded that I moved to Oklahoma, but I know He knew I needed to deal with my heart issues. Guilt and shame, forgiving myself and seeking forgiveness from others. Which brings me to this coming Friday, I start my first counseling session. Most people keep the fact that they might need help sorting issues from their past in the dark and never are able to heal. That is not what the Lord wants in our life. He wants us to live life to the fullest and know that we are completely forgiven. Pray with me as I take this next step in facing my past and no longer running from the demons who have haunted me for so long.
Friday, February 17, 2012
I totally broke my promise to myself, I downloaded Angry Birds! I swore that I would not waste any braincells on a video game. I know of hundreds of other things that I could spend my time on! I could do the laundry, dishes, sort clothes the kids have grown out of, enter contests online and win something but I did not want to find myself thinking about how to knock the darn monkey off its post. I have only had it for a few weeks but it is really cutting into my sleep time since the first thing my brain goes to when I can't sleep is Angry Birds Rio (I don't care for regular Angry Birds). Hmmm, the first thing my brain goes? A video game? I am usually not a great steward with my time and if you checked my bedroom you might suggest me for Hoarders but I know there are things that deserve my time way more than a game. In The New Living Translation Paul says, "We destroy every proud obstacle that keeps people from knowing God. We capture their rebellious thoughts and teach them to obey Christ."2 (Corinthians 10:5) Don't get my wrong, we all need down time, but if your first thought is putting the kids to bed so you can play a game, maybe it is time to start taking our thoughts captive again. I know I will be in making sure I am in charge of my thoughts. "Finally, brothers and sisters, keep your thoughts on whatever is right or deserves praise: things that are true, honorable, fair, pure, acceptable, or commendable." Philippians 4:8 God's Word Translation.